Homemade Ricotta AKA: Pure Determination

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I first saw this idea while at the gym.  While sweating away, I love watching Food Network.  I don't have it at home so it's such a treat.  I think I was watching Secrets of a Restaurant Chef.  She makes amazing braised meats all the time, I love her cooking.  At the end of her dish she whipped up a batch of warm fresh Ricotta, threw it on some crusty baguette and drizzled it with olive oil.  I thought I was going to drool onto the floor more than sweat onto it!  Are you kidding me!! Is making cheese (yes, Ricotta is not technically cheese, but hush up you know it all types), that easy!!! 

NO.   

And....

YES. 

My first try I had such high expectations!  I was going to look like a culinary genius.  I had my husband all prepped to see my awesome magic.  I had my palate ready. I had my Gazpacho made and awaiting it's perfect side.  I dove in.  

I poured my three cups whole milk.

I poured my one cup cream.
I sprinkled my one tsp salt. 

I heated it slowly till it boiled. 

I took it off the heat and added the 3-4 Tbs. Lemon juice. 

I stirred and waited for the magic....

and I waited....

and I stirred.....

and I waited....

and I began to feel sick.....

and I saw it thicken and have filmy thickness that turned into NOTHING.

Darn those smarty pants cooks!   How dare they charm me with their "so easy" talents!  It was awful.  I let it sit overnight to see if it would curdle in the night.  NOPE.  It looked the same in the morning.  I tried adding more acid, and boiling it some more.  NOPE.  Honestly, I don't know what went wrong except for one thing I'll share in a min.  

I immediately got on You Tube on my phone and started watching many different videos on the method.  It looked like I'd done it right! Darn it! 

I gave it a few weeks.  

Last night I tried again.  I did NOT plan it into a menu.  I was not that hopeful at all.  One batch I did with lemon juice....NOTHING.   I even tried letting it boil longer....nope.  

The second batch I did with vinegar....NOTHING.  

Then, I thought perhaps I should use a larger pot.  I had been using a large saucepan but I thought perhaps the boil was not getting to be as effective in such a thick amount of milks.  I got out my dutch oven and put the ingredients in.  I brought it to a boil and let it boil a bit.  I put in my lemon juice and stirred.  I did get a few more of the filmy curds than before but nothing exciting really.  I was now starting to get mad at the wasted milk (which I did save and plan to use as a creamy buttermilk substitute in waffles and pancakes).  I added just a splash of vinegar and decided to let it simmer, and simmer, and simmer.  I started doing things in the kitchen and just stirring it now and then.  I had it on a low to med heat.   Suddenly, it started to get thicker!  It was not really defined in curds but it was thickening!  I thought it would be worth straining to see what happened.  I put it in the strainer and went to bed.  I knew it had to sit for an hour. 

I played my Home Design app (which I LOVE!) and wished I'd not had so much Diet Pepsi that day.  My brain was wide awake.  My husband slipped into soft snoring next to me.  It was about 11:30pm.  I got up in about an hour and decided to go check (honestly the truth is, I almost forgot about the darn thing).  There was a great puddle of liquid under my strainer lined with cheese cloth, and there waiting for me in the strainer like a little mischievous but well meaning rascal, was my cheese.  In some fashion, I did it!  I put it in a bowl (I did squeeze a little on the cheese cloth to get out a tiny bit more liquid) and it held good shape!  I snuck in and gently tapped the sleeping mailman: 

Me whispering:

"I know this is so selfish and mean of me, but can you just open one eye!?"  

He loves me, so he did: "oh, eh, yeah?"

"I made cheese!!!!"

"oh, wow, alright!  Good job!"

Me: "okay, thank you, go back to sleep" 

So, next time?  Well, I think I'll bring it to a boil slower.  Letting it simmer and simmer.  Then, I'll add just the lemon juice and let it simmer low, low, low till I see some thickness.  I will not be turned off by tons of tiny curds because I know they still make cheese.  

I hope you get brave enough to try, but I really hope I've saved you some stress.  It's a good thing I'm stubborn.